Needles

The £25 Morrisons Christmas tree is out of the box and installed in all its glory. Money well spent as far as I’m concerned.

Following are step-by-step instructions on how to assemble a very fake Christmas tree…

Step One: Open box,  swear profusely at what looks like individual branches.

Step Two: Assemble base. Not too bad.

Step Three: Insert realistic looking branches into base.  Realise that branches are not individual.

Step Four: Connect interlocking sections together

Step Five: Separate individual “branches” for more realistic look

Step Six: Hours later, tree looks almost real

Step Seven: Hide crap tree with as much stuff as possible.

Just like a real tree, sweep up fake needles from floor. Done.